View source for Clown

{{JobPageHeader
|headerbgcolor = lightgreen
|headerfontcolor = black
|stafftype = SERVICE
|imagebgcolor = #eeeeff
|img_generic =
|img = Clown.png
|jobtitle = Clown
|access = [[Theatre]]
|additional = N/A
|difficulty = HONK!/Easy
|superior = [[Head of Personnel]], The [[Honkmother]]
|duties = Entertain the crew, make bad jokes, go on a holy quest to find bananium, HONK!
|guides = No external guides - HONK
|quote= Honk! Honk! Plow my clussy! 
}}

You are the funniest, most dangerous, and mentally unstable person on the station! This means that you are a clown, or most likely, a terrorist wearing makeup and a wig. The Clown doesn't have much to do other than be a silly little guy, a funny goober, an actual honker - The source of laughs, clussy jokes, and creampies! 

As a silly clown, your job is to make people laugh, try to kill you, and ask themselves ''Should I hit this man with a sledgehammer? You'll probably be busy most of the time telling jokes and playing pranks on the security team - which might in response open fire on you. 

'''Bare minimum requirements:''' Be funny to ''other'' crewmembers. Break the laws of reality by being a goofy aah clown. Be the Honk Mother's silliest warrior. 

== License to HONK ==

'''When in doubt, ask yourself: "Are you irrevocably fucking with someone's round (killing, incapacitating, etc.)?"'''

'''If yes: don't do it. You'll probably get robusted and banned.'''

'''If no: you're probably fine.'''

=== Honk ===
Honking is how you get your work done. If you honk a honk honk then honk up the honk, well you'll have a doozy of a honk on your honk to wash off.

=== Equipment ===
You get the clown suit with matching squeaky shoes (with built-in Waddle Dampeners[TM]), a bike horn, clown stamp (for approving monkey crates) clown mask (which works like a gas mask), a special infinite rainbow clown crayon so you can start writing naughty words all over the escape arm or eating it like a giant honking baby, a can of laughing juice, a banana, and your slippery [[PDA]]. Your PDA can infect people's PDAs with a virus that makes it randomly honk, and possibly do other things? Who knows, HONK!

=== Job Difficulty ===
Very little, but some people might want to kill you just for being the Clown. HONK!

== Tips ==
* The clown's mask can be used for internals.
* If the clown's PDA cartridge has less than 5 charges (sendable viruses which make someone’s PDA honk every time they push a button) left, someone who isn't the clown can slip on it to restore 1 charge per slip. Have fun with that.
* Eating the rainbow crayon completely is impossible. If you're a clown and starving you can just nibble on your crayon, for infinity.
* [http://aberrantkenosis.bandcamp.com/album/the-bike-horn-collection-volume-1 HONK!]
* Dye your clown shoes and slip them on someone, they still squeak.
* The clown's flower is basically a small spray bottle. It can be emptied and can carry 10 units of fluids and shoots exactly 1 unit at a time. So you can fire ten very small shots, and it has an impressive range. It can be loaded from the pepper spray wall units. Since it is one unit the stun does not last long, but it is good for a guaranteed disarm if they lack eye protection.
* With enough training in robustness, you can kill anyone in maint or near walls in a death-spiral combo they can't escape if you hit them with a single pie, remember, Pies are valuable and being quick on the throw is even more valuable.
* If somebody is chasing you and you haven't emptied your flower of water yet, you can empty it on the floor for a slip that is less obvious than a peel is.
* The clown's PDA can be used in lieu of a banana peel; people will slip on it just the same. Just remember to take the ID out so when some chucklefuck takes it, you aren't left with no access.
* Telling a few jokes or having a funny gimmick can mean the difference between getting all-access and being lynched after a prank gone wrong.
* You can toggle the built-in Waddle Dampeners[TM] in your shoes with CTRL + Click.



{{anchor | Jobs}}
{|width=100% border="1" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="2"
|-
| rowspan = 12 align = "center" | '''Honkers on Coom Station 69'''<br>
[[link=jobs]]
|-
| style="background: #334E6D; color: white; text-align: center;" id="command" |'''Law and Order'''
| '''[[Captain|Condom]]'''
|-
| textcolor="white" style="background: #AF6365; text-align: center;" id="security" |'''Fun Police'''
| '''[[Head of Security|No Fun]]''', [[Security Officer|Shitcurity Officer]], [[Warden|Mortal Kombat]], [[Detective|Can't Take a Joke]], [[Prisoner|Human Shield]]
|-
| style="background: #ba9b67; text-align: center;" id="engineering" |'''Black Magicians'''
| '''[[Chief Engineer|Poly's Keeper]]''', [[Station Engineer|Free Insulateds]],  [[Atmospheric Technician|Axe Bearer]]
|-
| style="background: #a885a2; text-align: center;" id="science" |'''Harmzone™'''
| '''[[Research Director|Nerdo Supreme]]''', [[Scientist|Slimer/Bomber/Nerd]], [[Roboticist|Doctor Wiley]], [[Geneticist|Enjoys Pranks]]
|-
| style="background: #8cbcd6; text-align: center;" id="medical" |'''The Stage'''
| '''[[Chief Medical Officer|Evil Bastard]]''', [[Medical Doctor|Quack]], [[Paramedic|Great Value Quack]], [[Chemist|Druglord/Lube Source]], [[Virologist|Lynch]], [[Coroner|Unpacks People like Packages]]
|-
| style="background: #AF763D; text-align: center;" id="supply" |'''Wage Slaves'''
| '''[[Quartermaster|Hardass]]''', [[Cargo Technician|Bribe For Toys]], [[Shaft Miner|Bringer of Bananium]]
|-
| style="background: #92b26d; text-align: center;" id="service" | '''Goobers'''
| '''[[Head of Personnel|All Access Provider]]''', [[Janitor|Enabler]], [[Bartender|Has a Gun]], [[Cook|Has a Knife]], [[Botanist|FREE PEELS]], [[Clown|The Most Charitable and Just Clown, Peace and Blessings Upon Them]], [[Mime|Mortal Enemy]], [[Chaplain|This is No Laughing Matter]], [[Librarian|Who Let You In Here?!]], [[Assistant|Space Ho<strike>m</strike>bos]], [[Lawyer|LOL2CAT!!!]], [[Psychologist|Normal Pill Supplier]]
|-
| style="background: #b1dff9; text-align: center;" id="nonHuman" | '''Goons'''
| '''[[AI|Doorknob]]''', [[Cyborg|No Humor Module]], [[Positronic Brain|Captive Audience]], [[Drone|A Fancy Hat]], [[Personal AI|Portable Supermatter Alarm]], [[Construct|No Touchie]], [[Imaginary Friend|Chained to the Floor Audience]], [[Split Personality|Hey! That Guy's Not Allowed to be Funny!]], [[Ghost|2Spooky4me]]
|-
| style="background: black; color: white; text-align: center;" id="antagonist" |'''Critics'''
| [[Traitor|Slip Em']], [[Malfunctioning AI|EVIL Doorknob]], [[Changeling|Honk It to Death]], [[Nuclear_Operative|Still Slippable]], [[Wizard|Wiznerd]], [[Cult|Emos]], [[Nightmare|Jumpscare]], [[Abductor|Ayyliens]], [[Xenomorph|KITTY]], [[Spider|TOP TEN PRANKS GONE WRONG]], [[Revenant|3spooky5me]], [[Space Ninja|Also Slippable]], [[Holoparasite|Your Best Friend]], [[Swarmers|Don't Cry]], [[Blob|Squishy]], [[Slaughter_Demon|Demoted Laughter Demon]], [[Devil|Free All Access Guy]], [[Pirate|Yakety Sax]], [[Sentient Disease|Diarrhea Dumpster]], [[Creep|Disposals Bait]], [[Fugitives|Leather Club's Two Blocks Down]], [[Hunters|I'll Show You Who's the Boss of this Gym]], [[Space Dragon|Insurance Fraudster]], [[Pulsating Tumor|Petting Zoo]], [[Sentient Slime|Anthropophized]], [[Rat King|High Priority Shipment, for the CMO!]], [[Paradox Clone|Suspicious Clown Imposter]]
|-
| style="text-align: center;" id="special" | '''"Special"'''
| '''[[Centcom Official|(un)Fun Inspector]]''', [[Death Squad|Prank Squad Officer]], [[Emergency Response Team|Emergency Response Pranksters (ERP)]], , [[Chrono Legionnaire|Slips Through Space and Time]], [[Highlander|No Underwear]], [[Ian|Free Meat]], [[Lavaland Role|Valids]], [[CentCom Intern|Corporate Hobos]]
|-
| style="background: #BBCCFF; color: black; text-align: center;" id="race" |'''Filth'''
| [[Lizardperson|Maximum Filth]], [[Flyperson|Vomitoriun]], [[Plasmaman|Free Internals]], [[Mothpeople|Fluttershy]], [[Podman|Literally Potatohead]], [[Golem|The Homo-Rainbow]], [[Felinids|Maximum-er Filth]], [[Ethereals|Lightbulbs]]
|}

[[Category:Jobs]]